Hey everybody, I just wanted to make a quick little blurb on here to say happy thanksgiving. No matter what happens, we've all got a lot to stop and say thanks for. So, in between helpings of turkey and pie, say a little thank you think about how lucky we all really are.
Have a great day everyone, and Hook 'em.
adios.
Thursday, November 27, 2008
Tuesday, November 25, 2008
the end of days is nigh
Earthquakes. Floods. Locusts.
Well, ok, there's no locusts, but crazy stuff is happening in bocas town. Let's start at the beginning, shall we?
One week ago today, we had an earthquake, or as I like to call it, an "oh my god what the hell is going on? We're all going to die everyone save yourself". Well, not really. It wasn't all that bad; in fact, I almost slept throught it. I was resting peacefully, off in my little slumber world when the quake struck. The earth was angry that day my friends, but I remained mostly oblivious. You know when you wake up, and you're kind of half awake but still dreaming? Well, that's what happened. I was jolted to alertness, but didn't quite wake up. I vaguely recall knowing that I was in the house, but the sleepy guy that I was thought that the house was on a boat and it was just the ocean acting up. I relaxed, and let the violent shaking rock be gently back to sleep. The next morning, I didn't even remember what had happened until someone asked me if I felt it. The more I thought about it the more my little dream came back to me and i realized that I'd slept through and earthquake. Fun times. The epicenter was on the border of Costa Rica and Panama, or thereabouts, and we didn't really even get the full force of it, but it was still enough to shake some things.
So that was fun, but it was just the beginning. Then the rain started. It has been raining, nonstop, (not an exaggeration) since the day after the quake. We're going on nearly a week here of just a steady, moderately hard rain. I'm safe, i'm ok down here in bocas, but inland there's a lot of damage. The roads are washed out and there are landslides all over the place. The only real bad nature thing here is the super super high tides. I went to the store the other day to get a bottle of water, and at the counter, i was in knee deep water. Carenero is pretty much underwater already; the whole thing is just a big swamp except for the beaches that skirt the island, but there were some waves crashing and flowing inland. It was interesting to watch. Not only that, the floods have knocked out the internet, the cell phone service, the landline service AND the ATM's on the island. (They all used the same dish tower) No planes have come or gone for several days save one or two privately chartered flights. People are stranded. I'm fine though, except I pretty much ran out of money yesterday. With the ATM's out, my cash was dwindling. I didn't have any groceries because I had just moved into a new apartment and i was hungry. With seven dollars in my pocket and no idea when the ATM's would come back online, i headed to the store. I stocked up; a can of tuna and a bag of chips cost me three dollars. It was so hard to spend that money because I just knew the ATMs would never work again and i'd run out of money and starve to death. Back at my place i ate my feast and watched a movie. It was a sad night. At one point, I was looking for a pen or something in my backpack and came across my little body-purse thing that I had worn in panama city. I vaguely recalled my dad telling me store some money away somewhere in case of emergencies, but I couldn't remember if i had done it or not. I checked the pockets and pulled out the most beautiful $100 bill that I had ever seen. I put on my bed, straightened it out so I could revel in its glory, and said a loud genuine thank you to my dad. It was a great moment, and just in time for the thanksgiving season.
Today though, everything is pretty much back up, ATM's included. It hasn't rained all that much today and I think the sun may actually come out. The bad news is that more rain is on the way. I'll be fine everybody, i promise, so instead of worrying about me, think about the people inland that need help. All things considered, the whole thanksgiving thing has taken on a whole new meaning to me. I'm so thankful and humbled after everything that's happened and i want to say an honest thanks to everyone that reads this, consistently or not. You guys are great, and although I've had a great time here, I've got the itch to get back to texas.
Once again, thanks for everything so far guys, I miss you all and I'll be thinking of you on turkey day when I crack open a fresh can of tuna.
adios.
Well, ok, there's no locusts, but crazy stuff is happening in bocas town. Let's start at the beginning, shall we?
One week ago today, we had an earthquake, or as I like to call it, an "oh my god what the hell is going on? We're all going to die everyone save yourself". Well, not really. It wasn't all that bad; in fact, I almost slept throught it. I was resting peacefully, off in my little slumber world when the quake struck. The earth was angry that day my friends, but I remained mostly oblivious. You know when you wake up, and you're kind of half awake but still dreaming? Well, that's what happened. I was jolted to alertness, but didn't quite wake up. I vaguely recall knowing that I was in the house, but the sleepy guy that I was thought that the house was on a boat and it was just the ocean acting up. I relaxed, and let the violent shaking rock be gently back to sleep. The next morning, I didn't even remember what had happened until someone asked me if I felt it. The more I thought about it the more my little dream came back to me and i realized that I'd slept through and earthquake. Fun times. The epicenter was on the border of Costa Rica and Panama, or thereabouts, and we didn't really even get the full force of it, but it was still enough to shake some things.
So that was fun, but it was just the beginning. Then the rain started. It has been raining, nonstop, (not an exaggeration) since the day after the quake. We're going on nearly a week here of just a steady, moderately hard rain. I'm safe, i'm ok down here in bocas, but inland there's a lot of damage. The roads are washed out and there are landslides all over the place. The only real bad nature thing here is the super super high tides. I went to the store the other day to get a bottle of water, and at the counter, i was in knee deep water. Carenero is pretty much underwater already; the whole thing is just a big swamp except for the beaches that skirt the island, but there were some waves crashing and flowing inland. It was interesting to watch. Not only that, the floods have knocked out the internet, the cell phone service, the landline service AND the ATM's on the island. (They all used the same dish tower) No planes have come or gone for several days save one or two privately chartered flights. People are stranded. I'm fine though, except I pretty much ran out of money yesterday. With the ATM's out, my cash was dwindling. I didn't have any groceries because I had just moved into a new apartment and i was hungry. With seven dollars in my pocket and no idea when the ATM's would come back online, i headed to the store. I stocked up; a can of tuna and a bag of chips cost me three dollars. It was so hard to spend that money because I just knew the ATMs would never work again and i'd run out of money and starve to death. Back at my place i ate my feast and watched a movie. It was a sad night. At one point, I was looking for a pen or something in my backpack and came across my little body-purse thing that I had worn in panama city. I vaguely recalled my dad telling me store some money away somewhere in case of emergencies, but I couldn't remember if i had done it or not. I checked the pockets and pulled out the most beautiful $100 bill that I had ever seen. I put on my bed, straightened it out so I could revel in its glory, and said a loud genuine thank you to my dad. It was a great moment, and just in time for the thanksgiving season.
Today though, everything is pretty much back up, ATM's included. It hasn't rained all that much today and I think the sun may actually come out. The bad news is that more rain is on the way. I'll be fine everybody, i promise, so instead of worrying about me, think about the people inland that need help. All things considered, the whole thanksgiving thing has taken on a whole new meaning to me. I'm so thankful and humbled after everything that's happened and i want to say an honest thanks to everyone that reads this, consistently or not. You guys are great, and although I've had a great time here, I've got the itch to get back to texas.
Once again, thanks for everything so far guys, I miss you all and I'll be thinking of you on turkey day when I crack open a fresh can of tuna.
adios.
Tuesday, November 18, 2008
I am alive. I'm aware that it's been several weeks since my last little blurb on here, and for that, loyal fans, i am sorry. But the bottom line is that I am still breathing and still going strong here in beautiful bocas del toro.
The reason I haven't really updated much is that not a lot had really been going on around here. It was pretty slow up until about a week ago when the excrement hit the proverbial fan at los balcones. As you know, I have been waiting tables there when we're lucky enough to have a few customers, which was quite rare. Anyway, it caught up to us and the place is pretty much going under. Going under in that it's pretty much bankrupt. Gabriel, the owner, isn't even around anymore since his wife had a baby a few weeks ago and they're living in David, a city about four hours away. So he comes in a few days a week to check up on the place and fret over the lack of money the place is bringing in. So, the place has been pretty damn slow. I mean slow. There were a few nights in which we served absolutely no food. None. No customers. Not a good thing. And yet, i'm still there, technically working, making my $2 an hour the easy way. I went through a few good books at work. So, the lack of customers and the payroll didn't mix well, and eventually, Gabriel had to let one of the cooks go. Miguel was his name. I was teaching him english and he was so nice and happy all the time that it was really hard to see him go. With his departure, there were something like 6 workers left. Payday came and went without so much as the promise of a payment. Moods soured and it became apparent that this ship was going down. Fast. I continued to work like the busy little bee that I am; gave me a good chance to catch up on my reading and napping and spanish practicing. A week passed, again with no money. Juan told me that he was going to quit, and it became apparent that I should probably consider the same course of action, after I get my money. Gabriel kept giving me later dates, promising to pay the next day or the next week or whatever and eventually, I went on strike. I called in and said, hey, um, i'm not going to work again until I get paid, so, yeah. Gabriel apologized profusely and swore he'd have the money the next day. So when that day rolled around, i went into work to get my money and continue to wait tables. How naive I was. I got there and wasn't going to set any tables or do any real work until I got my money, so I chilled out in the kitchen with Juan and Rosanna. Eventually, Gabriel comes in and asks if he can meet with me in the office. Moment of truth. In the office, he tells me he's really sorry and he's in a lot of debt, you know...the whole sob story forgive me type thing. I told him it was cool, i understand or whatever, I just want my money. It's just business, nothing personal, I just want my money. He showed me a little sheet with my hours or whatever and what he thought he owed me. It was about ten bucks more than what I thought i was owed, so I was alllllll for it. Then the bombshell came crashing into the office. "I'm really sorry man, but I don't have all of the money right now. I can give you about 80 bucks." Not cool. I had waited almost two weeks to get my money, and now this guy wants to tell me that he only has half of it? No, not going to happen. "Hey Gabe, that's not really going to be good enough. You're already two weeks late, I need all my money or I'm not going to be able to work anymore." Stern, yet amiable. I stood my ground. Then, the dirty rat said "yeah, man, you're right. You're a hard worker. I'll give you all your money." He reaches into his wallet and pulls out the remainder of my dough. I was incredulous. Did he really think that he could get away with just stiffing me half my pay? Did he tell me his tragic tale of debt so I wouldn't be surprised when he didn't have all my money? I wasn't hitting him up for a large sum of money. I wasn't going to break his kneecaps, yet. So after he paid me, he told me he can't afford to make payroll anymore and he'd have to let me go and how much it hurt him because I'm such a hard worker or whatever. So now I'm on an on-call basis over there and if they need me, they'll give me a call. They haven't called yet. I don't anticipate that they will, since last I heard there's not even a kitchen staff anymore. Just marisol making drinks for hotel guests and whatever gringos pull up in their boats. So it goes.
what else what else what else?
Joe's monkey pet stole my panama cell phone. Yes, this is a true story.
I was sleeping on the futon in my living room, and Joes pet monkey came in and was hanging out around me sleepy body. He was going through my pockets and I'm pretty sure he ran off with my cellular phone. It's pretty much par for the course, according to joe. The monkey takes things, hides them, and occasionally they're never seen again. I was pretty sure it would turn up at some point so I waited a few days before I broke down and bought a new one. Only in panama.
Other than those two more or less amusing anecdotes it's been pretty slow down here. My life is pretty much beach, sun, eat, sleep repeat. Sounds tough, huh? Actually, it's been a really cool experience so far, and I'm really enjoying it. I've seen a lot of cool things, met a lot of cool people and am going to have a really hard time leaving this place. It has most definitely been a learning experience and I feel like I've changed, even in a minor way, for the better.
One last thing, I almost forgot to mention. I went swimming a few nights ago after it got dark. I was having a good time, just splashing around, chilling out, when I noticed something in the water. It looked like bubbles were flowing off of my hands as I treaded water. Upon closer inspection, I realized that it was not, in fact, bubbles, but something glowing under the water. It was phosphorescent algae, which is, gasp, a type of algae that glows when it's been disturbed. So, naturally, swimming disturbs them and causes them to blow up like cheap fireworks. It's probably the most beautiful thing I've ever seen. It's like swimming in a sea of green sparks. It's just one of those things that I never knew existed and now I can't forget. That's pretty much the story of my trip.
Once again, loyal reader, I am sorry it has taken me so much time to post here. It's not because I'm mad at you, I promise.
adios
The reason I haven't really updated much is that not a lot had really been going on around here. It was pretty slow up until about a week ago when the excrement hit the proverbial fan at los balcones. As you know, I have been waiting tables there when we're lucky enough to have a few customers, which was quite rare. Anyway, it caught up to us and the place is pretty much going under. Going under in that it's pretty much bankrupt. Gabriel, the owner, isn't even around anymore since his wife had a baby a few weeks ago and they're living in David, a city about four hours away. So he comes in a few days a week to check up on the place and fret over the lack of money the place is bringing in. So, the place has been pretty damn slow. I mean slow. There were a few nights in which we served absolutely no food. None. No customers. Not a good thing. And yet, i'm still there, technically working, making my $2 an hour the easy way. I went through a few good books at work. So, the lack of customers and the payroll didn't mix well, and eventually, Gabriel had to let one of the cooks go. Miguel was his name. I was teaching him english and he was so nice and happy all the time that it was really hard to see him go. With his departure, there were something like 6 workers left. Payday came and went without so much as the promise of a payment. Moods soured and it became apparent that this ship was going down. Fast. I continued to work like the busy little bee that I am; gave me a good chance to catch up on my reading and napping and spanish practicing. A week passed, again with no money. Juan told me that he was going to quit, and it became apparent that I should probably consider the same course of action, after I get my money. Gabriel kept giving me later dates, promising to pay the next day or the next week or whatever and eventually, I went on strike. I called in and said, hey, um, i'm not going to work again until I get paid, so, yeah. Gabriel apologized profusely and swore he'd have the money the next day. So when that day rolled around, i went into work to get my money and continue to wait tables. How naive I was. I got there and wasn't going to set any tables or do any real work until I got my money, so I chilled out in the kitchen with Juan and Rosanna. Eventually, Gabriel comes in and asks if he can meet with me in the office. Moment of truth. In the office, he tells me he's really sorry and he's in a lot of debt, you know...the whole sob story forgive me type thing. I told him it was cool, i understand or whatever, I just want my money. It's just business, nothing personal, I just want my money. He showed me a little sheet with my hours or whatever and what he thought he owed me. It was about ten bucks more than what I thought i was owed, so I was alllllll for it. Then the bombshell came crashing into the office. "I'm really sorry man, but I don't have all of the money right now. I can give you about 80 bucks." Not cool. I had waited almost two weeks to get my money, and now this guy wants to tell me that he only has half of it? No, not going to happen. "Hey Gabe, that's not really going to be good enough. You're already two weeks late, I need all my money or I'm not going to be able to work anymore." Stern, yet amiable. I stood my ground. Then, the dirty rat said "yeah, man, you're right. You're a hard worker. I'll give you all your money." He reaches into his wallet and pulls out the remainder of my dough. I was incredulous. Did he really think that he could get away with just stiffing me half my pay? Did he tell me his tragic tale of debt so I wouldn't be surprised when he didn't have all my money? I wasn't hitting him up for a large sum of money. I wasn't going to break his kneecaps, yet. So after he paid me, he told me he can't afford to make payroll anymore and he'd have to let me go and how much it hurt him because I'm such a hard worker or whatever. So now I'm on an on-call basis over there and if they need me, they'll give me a call. They haven't called yet. I don't anticipate that they will, since last I heard there's not even a kitchen staff anymore. Just marisol making drinks for hotel guests and whatever gringos pull up in their boats. So it goes.
what else what else what else?
Joe's monkey pet stole my panama cell phone. Yes, this is a true story.
I was sleeping on the futon in my living room, and Joes pet monkey came in and was hanging out around me sleepy body. He was going through my pockets and I'm pretty sure he ran off with my cellular phone. It's pretty much par for the course, according to joe. The monkey takes things, hides them, and occasionally they're never seen again. I was pretty sure it would turn up at some point so I waited a few days before I broke down and bought a new one. Only in panama.
Other than those two more or less amusing anecdotes it's been pretty slow down here. My life is pretty much beach, sun, eat, sleep repeat. Sounds tough, huh? Actually, it's been a really cool experience so far, and I'm really enjoying it. I've seen a lot of cool things, met a lot of cool people and am going to have a really hard time leaving this place. It has most definitely been a learning experience and I feel like I've changed, even in a minor way, for the better.
One last thing, I almost forgot to mention. I went swimming a few nights ago after it got dark. I was having a good time, just splashing around, chilling out, when I noticed something in the water. It looked like bubbles were flowing off of my hands as I treaded water. Upon closer inspection, I realized that it was not, in fact, bubbles, but something glowing under the water. It was phosphorescent algae, which is, gasp, a type of algae that glows when it's been disturbed. So, naturally, swimming disturbs them and causes them to blow up like cheap fireworks. It's probably the most beautiful thing I've ever seen. It's like swimming in a sea of green sparks. It's just one of those things that I never knew existed and now I can't forget. That's pretty much the story of my trip.
Once again, loyal reader, I am sorry it has taken me so much time to post here. It's not because I'm mad at you, I promise.
adios
Sunday, October 26, 2008
Shoddy workmanship
I have now joined an elite fraternity. It took me five weeks to accomplish the necessary tasks and earn the right to call myself a true member of this most prestigious club.
I fell through a dock.
Ok, so, I was walking down a dock to catch a water taxi with joe, when i heard a crack. Next thing I know, I'm falling toward the water at roughly 9.8 m/s^2. I actually had the presence of mind to get a grip as i fell and thrust myself onto another piece of wood so I didn't actually land in the water. I did, however, manage to scrape my left shin along another piece of wood, leaving a nasty trail of scrapes and a pretty impressive, baseball sized bruise in its wake. So I'm in a bit of pain. It's nothing serious, i didn't break anything, the dock excluded, and I've definitely had worse injuries. But I'll be fine here in a few days.
Other than that, I haven't been robbed lately, so I guess I'm doing alright.
Also, I moved. Again. Pictures to come.
adios
I fell through a dock.
Ok, so, I was walking down a dock to catch a water taxi with joe, when i heard a crack. Next thing I know, I'm falling toward the water at roughly 9.8 m/s^2. I actually had the presence of mind to get a grip as i fell and thrust myself onto another piece of wood so I didn't actually land in the water. I did, however, manage to scrape my left shin along another piece of wood, leaving a nasty trail of scrapes and a pretty impressive, baseball sized bruise in its wake. So I'm in a bit of pain. It's nothing serious, i didn't break anything, the dock excluded, and I've definitely had worse injuries. But I'll be fine here in a few days.
Other than that, I haven't been robbed lately, so I guess I'm doing alright.
Also, I moved. Again. Pictures to come.
adios
Thursday, October 23, 2008
Trouble in Paradise OR How JJ got his stuff back
I was robbed.
As I slept on Tuesday night, someone with enormous balls crept into my room and stole my backpack. Actually, I'm assuming the thief had giant, brass testicles because he was about three feet away from me when he opened my bag, removed my passport and passed it through the bathroom window. Once the deed was done, he crept out the front door, past four other sleeping dudes and disappeared into the darkness. That had to take some serious, serious bravery or an extreme crack addiction. I'd prefer it do be the whole bravery thing. Drugs are bad.
So I wake up the next day. Life is good, the sun is shining. I still had that just-woke-woke-still-a-little-groggy air about me when i noticed my passport in a box next to my bed. "Hm..." i thought to myself, "Who left their passport out. That's just foolish." So i picked it up and checked it. "Oh, it's MY passport. That's weird, I keep this in my back..." at that exact moment, i realized what had happened. My heart sank through the floor of the house and landed in the sand under my feet. I went absolutely nuts. My computer, my camera, my iphone, my watch, some notebooks, my sunglasses, and all my chargers and cords were gone. Just like that. Like they had never been there. The conscientious thief did leave my passport, so I had that going for me. Immediately, the roommates and I hatched a plan.
We immediately assumed that the brass-balled thief was none other than Kkleyton, a rastafarian who Brian employs to do various work with the jetskis and stuff. Yes, that's really how he spells his name. With all the ruckus going on, the neighbor, a panamanian guy with at least 14 kids took notice and came over. He said that he was sorry he didn't say anything before, but the other day, he saw two black rasta guys (kkleyton [from now on I'm going to call him clay, get over it] and one of his many many many cousins) passing a computer bag through the bathroom window. Interesting...Tim, the surfer guy that hangs out here, had his computer stolen a few days before. So now we pretty much knew that clay was in on it. We figured that even if somebody had woken up mid-robbery, they would have seen him, and probably not thought much of it since he's here sometimes anyway and it wasn't too unusual for him to crash here occasionally. So, we went through the scenarios in our heads, like Tim Curry in the Clue movie, and decided that we should: A) Go to the cops. Tim, Josh and myself would go to the police, fill out reports, and do shit the right way. 2) Brian and Joe would go find clay, and just keep an eye on him to make sure he didn't leave with a nice new backpack.
On the way to the police station, we ran into Rosanna, a chef at the restaurant and Juan's wife. I informed her of my predicament and she volunteered to come to the police station to serve as a translator. Double awesome. Three hours later, two reports had been filed and the police said they'd meet me at my house in an hour to take finger prints.
After a quick lunch at subway (yes, one just opened in bocas town last week and I never thought that Subway would represent comfort food. Plus I was hoping that they might have dr. pepper. They don't) we headed home to find clay, brian, and joe chillaxing like nothing had happened and nothing had been burgled. Then, the police showed up and shit got interesting. They came in and fingerprinted the bathroom window, took a shit ton of pictures and talked to everyone about what happened in both my case and tim's. Then, they took clay to their boat, which is an awesome drug-running boat that they confiscated from, well, drug runners. As they walked him out, he looked at me and asked me why they were taking him to jail. I said, "dude, I don't know if you did it," (p.s. that was a lie) "but I just want my stuff back. If you know where it is, tell me or tell them and get it back to me." They walked him to the boat, took some more pictures and left just in time for me to have to go to work.
At this point, I had pretty conceded that would never see any of my shit ever again. The most I could do was hope that some young children would learn to read using my computer, or donate my camera to charity or some nice thing. So, I'm at work for, I don't know, an hour, when clay walks in and asks me to go outside with him. Of course, i shit a brick and just knew that I was going to get stabbed in the eyes and even if i got my shit back i'd never see it again. So I asked Juan to join me, mostly because he's a boxer and I'm pretty sure he wouldn't hesitate to punch a bear in the ovaries. So we walk out to talk to clay and he shows me a dollar bill with a phone number on it. "Aye men, Aye tall yoo wat. Dey let me owt da jell hasta six dirty and de tall me aye nee to fine yoo stoff o they gon' thro me back in. Somebody tell me if yoo kawl de nomba ayn yoo ask fo yo shit, day kno where it be."
So I call the number on the dollar, and a guy answers. Before he has a chance to say anything, I tell him I want my stuff back, and I want it back now. He told me he didn't speak english, and for some reason I turned into Ricky Ricardo. My rage boiled over and for a few seconds I spoke fluent spanish. I told him that I wanted my stuff right now, or he and Clayton and everyone is going to jail. The guy on the other side of the phone said he'd give it back to me for $850. Instinct took over. "Go fuck yourself," I said. In retrospect, it probably wasn't the smartest thing to say but it go things moving. I told him "I can't possibly pay you that much money. I can't make any money without my computer anyway. You're completely insane." After some quick negotiation, I got the price down to less than a third of what he asked for. At this point, clayton was about 15 from going to jail, and even though he obviously wasn't the one on the other phone, it was pretty obvious that he did it, or had direct knowledge of who did and knew exactly where to find it. So anyway, I ran into town, got some cash from the ATM, and came back. I handed clay the money with Juan standing next to me and told him to get my shit right now. He said he'd be back in ten minutes with the backpack and the stuff inside. "You'd better be back in 5 minutes or I'm calling the police." he was back in four minutes.
I opened the bag to make sure the stuff was there. For the most part, it was there: my camera, hard drive, camera cord, computer charger and most importantly, my computer. The iphone was missing, but i was so relieved that i really didnt care. It's replaceable and now I can get a new one. I was really tempted to hug clayton but then I remembered that he was the one that did it and that hug became stab. Then, he asked me to sit down and call the police and tell them that i had my stuff back so he wouldn't go to jail. I made the call with him sitting next to me, and the inspector asked me to come in the next day. I told him over the phone that I didn't recognize the guy that I had done the deal with, but only because clay was sitting right next to me. Then clay left, and I went back to work, relieved but still mad that it happened in the first place.
Today at the police station, i had to fill out another report, but I told them all about clayton being the "middleman" and how it all went down. They told me, and please, keep this to yourself, to tell him that as far as i'm concerned the investigation is over and they're no longer actively pursuing him. It is, of course, bullshit. I'm pretty sure that they're going to set up some kind of sting operation with Tim's computer and haul clayton off to jail. The sooner the better.
Not everything has been bad though, in fact, i was having a great week.
Joe's dad and stepmom came into town the other night from their island. We all hung out and they invited me out to their island the next day and night. So the next day I called in dead to work and took off.
It was about a 45 minute boat ride out to their island. I was a little skeptical of the whole situation, to be honest, because there are a lot of islands. I figured they had a little piece of land that stuck out of the water a little bit and there was a house on it. I was mistaken.
As you can see, for the most part, i was right. It really is just a piece of land that sticks out of the water a little bit, but it's AWESOME. Joe's dad, Keith, burnt the whole thing to the ground five years ago to get rid of the snakes, bugs, armadillos, plants, hippies, and everything else that they didn't want there, and then he planted golf course grass. I mean, this is some high quality stuff. They're one step away from having to hire Bill Murray's character from Caddyshack. Then, after the grass got going, they put in a few buildings, one's a bedroom, one's a kitchen, one's a living room/bedroom, and another grass-hut type building with yet another bed in it. That's where I slept, here's a picture.
So basically, this whole island is like a big treehouse. If Gilligan and co. had been here, they wouldn't have wanted to be rescued, not that they really seemed like they did anyway. That professor should have just built a raft or something. Crazy Gilligan. Anyway, the island is kind of remote, so they don't get a lot of boat traffic nearby. In fact, when this guy drove by, keith said it was the busiest he'd seen it all week.
yes, there's a canoe out there. Yes, that was the only boat that went by all day.
But the best part of the whole island...well, let me show you.
Yep, MONKEYS. Well, just one monkey. He's their pet, and he's awesome. as you can see, he liked my camera, but he also liked my sunglass my shoes, my hair, chairs, food, bugs, water hoses, grass, ropes, hammocks and the dogs. Check it out.
Why yes, as a matter a of fact, that monkey is riding on a dog. But that wasn't even the cutest thing on the island.
This little guy was.
No, not the human, that's Joe by the way. I'm talking about his pet kinkajou, Bradley. Bradley is awesome. He's like a monkey, but without Ebola or AIDS. It's like the best of both worlds. Also, he has little hands and feet that look and feel like human hands and feet. Ha ha, nature is hilarious.
Bradley liked me:
Probably because I'm so damn awesome. That must be it.
Here's a picture of one of their dogs, Jack, keeping an eye on his domain.
And the sunrise was beautiful.
Keith and his wife came and woke me up so I wouldn't miss it and although it was really early, i really appreciated it. Words don't do it justice.
Speaking of sun events, I just had to take a picture of the sunset the other day, it was absolutely epic.
When my camera was stolen, I was really worried that I wouldn't be able to see all this stuff again, thank goodness I got it back. Shit sucks, but life is good.
adios.
As I slept on Tuesday night, someone with enormous balls crept into my room and stole my backpack. Actually, I'm assuming the thief had giant, brass testicles because he was about three feet away from me when he opened my bag, removed my passport and passed it through the bathroom window. Once the deed was done, he crept out the front door, past four other sleeping dudes and disappeared into the darkness. That had to take some serious, serious bravery or an extreme crack addiction. I'd prefer it do be the whole bravery thing. Drugs are bad.
So I wake up the next day. Life is good, the sun is shining. I still had that just-woke-woke-still-a-little-groggy air about me when i noticed my passport in a box next to my bed. "Hm..." i thought to myself, "Who left their passport out. That's just foolish." So i picked it up and checked it. "Oh, it's MY passport. That's weird, I keep this in my back..." at that exact moment, i realized what had happened. My heart sank through the floor of the house and landed in the sand under my feet. I went absolutely nuts. My computer, my camera, my iphone, my watch, some notebooks, my sunglasses, and all my chargers and cords were gone. Just like that. Like they had never been there. The conscientious thief did leave my passport, so I had that going for me. Immediately, the roommates and I hatched a plan.
We immediately assumed that the brass-balled thief was none other than Kkleyton, a rastafarian who Brian employs to do various work with the jetskis and stuff. Yes, that's really how he spells his name. With all the ruckus going on, the neighbor, a panamanian guy with at least 14 kids took notice and came over. He said that he was sorry he didn't say anything before, but the other day, he saw two black rasta guys (kkleyton [from now on I'm going to call him clay, get over it] and one of his many many many cousins) passing a computer bag through the bathroom window. Interesting...Tim, the surfer guy that hangs out here, had his computer stolen a few days before. So now we pretty much knew that clay was in on it. We figured that even if somebody had woken up mid-robbery, they would have seen him, and probably not thought much of it since he's here sometimes anyway and it wasn't too unusual for him to crash here occasionally. So, we went through the scenarios in our heads, like Tim Curry in the Clue movie, and decided that we should: A) Go to the cops. Tim, Josh and myself would go to the police, fill out reports, and do shit the right way. 2) Brian and Joe would go find clay, and just keep an eye on him to make sure he didn't leave with a nice new backpack.
On the way to the police station, we ran into Rosanna, a chef at the restaurant and Juan's wife. I informed her of my predicament and she volunteered to come to the police station to serve as a translator. Double awesome. Three hours later, two reports had been filed and the police said they'd meet me at my house in an hour to take finger prints.
After a quick lunch at subway (yes, one just opened in bocas town last week and I never thought that Subway would represent comfort food. Plus I was hoping that they might have dr. pepper. They don't) we headed home to find clay, brian, and joe chillaxing like nothing had happened and nothing had been burgled. Then, the police showed up and shit got interesting. They came in and fingerprinted the bathroom window, took a shit ton of pictures and talked to everyone about what happened in both my case and tim's. Then, they took clay to their boat, which is an awesome drug-running boat that they confiscated from, well, drug runners. As they walked him out, he looked at me and asked me why they were taking him to jail. I said, "dude, I don't know if you did it," (p.s. that was a lie) "but I just want my stuff back. If you know where it is, tell me or tell them and get it back to me." They walked him to the boat, took some more pictures and left just in time for me to have to go to work.
At this point, I had pretty conceded that would never see any of my shit ever again. The most I could do was hope that some young children would learn to read using my computer, or donate my camera to charity or some nice thing. So, I'm at work for, I don't know, an hour, when clay walks in and asks me to go outside with him. Of course, i shit a brick and just knew that I was going to get stabbed in the eyes and even if i got my shit back i'd never see it again. So I asked Juan to join me, mostly because he's a boxer and I'm pretty sure he wouldn't hesitate to punch a bear in the ovaries. So we walk out to talk to clay and he shows me a dollar bill with a phone number on it. "Aye men, Aye tall yoo wat. Dey let me owt da jell hasta six dirty and de tall me aye nee to fine yoo stoff o they gon' thro me back in. Somebody tell me if yoo kawl de nomba ayn yoo ask fo yo shit, day kno where it be."
So I call the number on the dollar, and a guy answers. Before he has a chance to say anything, I tell him I want my stuff back, and I want it back now. He told me he didn't speak english, and for some reason I turned into Ricky Ricardo. My rage boiled over and for a few seconds I spoke fluent spanish. I told him that I wanted my stuff right now, or he and Clayton and everyone is going to jail. The guy on the other side of the phone said he'd give it back to me for $850. Instinct took over. "Go fuck yourself," I said. In retrospect, it probably wasn't the smartest thing to say but it go things moving. I told him "I can't possibly pay you that much money. I can't make any money without my computer anyway. You're completely insane." After some quick negotiation, I got the price down to less than a third of what he asked for. At this point, clayton was about 15 from going to jail, and even though he obviously wasn't the one on the other phone, it was pretty obvious that he did it, or had direct knowledge of who did and knew exactly where to find it. So anyway, I ran into town, got some cash from the ATM, and came back. I handed clay the money with Juan standing next to me and told him to get my shit right now. He said he'd be back in ten minutes with the backpack and the stuff inside. "You'd better be back in 5 minutes or I'm calling the police." he was back in four minutes.
I opened the bag to make sure the stuff was there. For the most part, it was there: my camera, hard drive, camera cord, computer charger and most importantly, my computer. The iphone was missing, but i was so relieved that i really didnt care. It's replaceable and now I can get a new one. I was really tempted to hug clayton but then I remembered that he was the one that did it and that hug became stab. Then, he asked me to sit down and call the police and tell them that i had my stuff back so he wouldn't go to jail. I made the call with him sitting next to me, and the inspector asked me to come in the next day. I told him over the phone that I didn't recognize the guy that I had done the deal with, but only because clay was sitting right next to me. Then clay left, and I went back to work, relieved but still mad that it happened in the first place.
Today at the police station, i had to fill out another report, but I told them all about clayton being the "middleman" and how it all went down. They told me, and please, keep this to yourself, to tell him that as far as i'm concerned the investigation is over and they're no longer actively pursuing him. It is, of course, bullshit. I'm pretty sure that they're going to set up some kind of sting operation with Tim's computer and haul clayton off to jail. The sooner the better.
Not everything has been bad though, in fact, i was having a great week.
Joe's dad and stepmom came into town the other night from their island. We all hung out and they invited me out to their island the next day and night. So the next day I called in dead to work and took off.
It was about a 45 minute boat ride out to their island. I was a little skeptical of the whole situation, to be honest, because there are a lot of islands. I figured they had a little piece of land that stuck out of the water a little bit and there was a house on it. I was mistaken.
As you can see, for the most part, i was right. It really is just a piece of land that sticks out of the water a little bit, but it's AWESOME. Joe's dad, Keith, burnt the whole thing to the ground five years ago to get rid of the snakes, bugs, armadillos, plants, hippies, and everything else that they didn't want there, and then he planted golf course grass. I mean, this is some high quality stuff. They're one step away from having to hire Bill Murray's character from Caddyshack. Then, after the grass got going, they put in a few buildings, one's a bedroom, one's a kitchen, one's a living room/bedroom, and another grass-hut type building with yet another bed in it. That's where I slept, here's a picture.
So basically, this whole island is like a big treehouse. If Gilligan and co. had been here, they wouldn't have wanted to be rescued, not that they really seemed like they did anyway. That professor should have just built a raft or something. Crazy Gilligan. Anyway, the island is kind of remote, so they don't get a lot of boat traffic nearby. In fact, when this guy drove by, keith said it was the busiest he'd seen it all week.
yes, there's a canoe out there. Yes, that was the only boat that went by all day.
But the best part of the whole island...well, let me show you.
Yep, MONKEYS. Well, just one monkey. He's their pet, and he's awesome. as you can see, he liked my camera, but he also liked my sunglass my shoes, my hair, chairs, food, bugs, water hoses, grass, ropes, hammocks and the dogs. Check it out.
Why yes, as a matter a of fact, that monkey is riding on a dog. But that wasn't even the cutest thing on the island.
This little guy was.
No, not the human, that's Joe by the way. I'm talking about his pet kinkajou, Bradley. Bradley is awesome. He's like a monkey, but without Ebola or AIDS. It's like the best of both worlds. Also, he has little hands and feet that look and feel like human hands and feet. Ha ha, nature is hilarious.
Bradley liked me:
Probably because I'm so damn awesome. That must be it.
Here's a picture of one of their dogs, Jack, keeping an eye on his domain.
And the sunrise was beautiful.
Keith and his wife came and woke me up so I wouldn't miss it and although it was really early, i really appreciated it. Words don't do it justice.
Speaking of sun events, I just had to take a picture of the sunset the other day, it was absolutely epic.
When my camera was stolen, I was really worried that I wouldn't be able to see all this stuff again, thank goodness I got it back. Shit sucks, but life is good.
adios.
Friday, October 17, 2008
Ok, bear with me here
So, I know this is a bit of a stretch, but how incredibly awesome would it be to ride a motorcycle back to texas? Blah blah blah, its dangerous, blah blah blah. I know I know. But all naysaying and reasonable thinking aside, wouldn't it be the coolest thing ever? It's just a thought...for now.
Wednesday, October 15, 2008
one fish, two fish, dead fish, blue fish
Hey guys, I'm coming to you from the comfort of the hammock once again. The weather isn't perfect today, but it's still pretty damn nice. We've some clouds rolling in off the mountains to the south and it's keeping the temperature in the lower 80's. It'll probably rain tonight, and the circle of life will march on.
I'm a little sunburned today because Juan, Josh and I went spearfishing for about 4 hours yesterday. We started off at the restaurant-dove in right of the dock. Unfortunately, it was mostly a snorkeling expedition. I didn't even get to shoot at anything. I did watch Juan in action though. He's a spearfishing ninja. He can hold his breath for days. He's like Kevin Costner in Waterworld, but without the gills and a much better actor.
So, after that we moved on to spot 2: a shrimp boat that's tied up to a pier on the other side of the island. The water is clearer there, but it's also quite a bit shallower. We were there for about six seconds when Juan caught his first fish. He tossed the fish on the bank and went back to end the lives of even more fish. We were there for about an hour, Juan caught a few more fish, and I realized how much I suck at shooting a speargun. On the plus side, I did sheck out some HUGE starfish.
We ended the day at our dock behind the house, or is it the front? Anyway, we were trying to kill this decent sized fish that likes to hang out around the house. He was good though, crafty and quick. Even Juan came up empty handed. We ended up getting a few smaller sized fish that I'm gonna take into work today and get fried up for me. Life is good.
So my fishing experiences have lit a fire in me. Tomorrow I'm going to town to buy a speargun and I'm going to spend all my free time snorkeling, looking at fish and killing the big ones. Also, eating and sleeping. I want to become the guy from the dos equis commercials, you know, the most interesting man in the world? I can see it now..."He once caught a great white shark with nothing more than a spear gun and a grudge." I'll either have a great story to tell or an awesome obituary.
So life continues to be extremely difficult down here. I'm thinking about spending the next few days getting my scuba certification. It's something that I've always wanted to do and now's the time to carpe the day.
This place is absolutely full of insane characters. Every single day I meet someone that just amazes me and has hilarious stories. I wish I could bottle this stuff. Caveat: The prostitution here is pretty insane. By here, I mean in panama, not in bocas. But a lot of the old locals talk candidly about how they pay $150 to have girls flown here. It's a little awkward. And by a little, I mean extremely. I laugh it off, and sometimes, genuinely funny stories result, but I swear to god if another 80 year old man tells me about the last weekend he spent with "mya" i'm going spearfishing. For human, the most dangerous game.
It's hard to get too mad though, with the view that I wake up to every day. When I buy my speargun, I'll take some pictures of it and my first haul of fish. Until then, I'll just keep on keeping on.
adios
I'm a little sunburned today because Juan, Josh and I went spearfishing for about 4 hours yesterday. We started off at the restaurant-dove in right of the dock. Unfortunately, it was mostly a snorkeling expedition. I didn't even get to shoot at anything. I did watch Juan in action though. He's a spearfishing ninja. He can hold his breath for days. He's like Kevin Costner in Waterworld, but without the gills and a much better actor.
So, after that we moved on to spot 2: a shrimp boat that's tied up to a pier on the other side of the island. The water is clearer there, but it's also quite a bit shallower. We were there for about six seconds when Juan caught his first fish. He tossed the fish on the bank and went back to end the lives of even more fish. We were there for about an hour, Juan caught a few more fish, and I realized how much I suck at shooting a speargun. On the plus side, I did sheck out some HUGE starfish.
We ended the day at our dock behind the house, or is it the front? Anyway, we were trying to kill this decent sized fish that likes to hang out around the house. He was good though, crafty and quick. Even Juan came up empty handed. We ended up getting a few smaller sized fish that I'm gonna take into work today and get fried up for me. Life is good.
So my fishing experiences have lit a fire in me. Tomorrow I'm going to town to buy a speargun and I'm going to spend all my free time snorkeling, looking at fish and killing the big ones. Also, eating and sleeping. I want to become the guy from the dos equis commercials, you know, the most interesting man in the world? I can see it now..."He once caught a great white shark with nothing more than a spear gun and a grudge." I'll either have a great story to tell or an awesome obituary.
So life continues to be extremely difficult down here. I'm thinking about spending the next few days getting my scuba certification. It's something that I've always wanted to do and now's the time to carpe the day.
This place is absolutely full of insane characters. Every single day I meet someone that just amazes me and has hilarious stories. I wish I could bottle this stuff. Caveat: The prostitution here is pretty insane. By here, I mean in panama, not in bocas. But a lot of the old locals talk candidly about how they pay $150 to have girls flown here. It's a little awkward. And by a little, I mean extremely. I laugh it off, and sometimes, genuinely funny stories result, but I swear to god if another 80 year old man tells me about the last weekend he spent with "mya" i'm going spearfishing. For human, the most dangerous game.
It's hard to get too mad though, with the view that I wake up to every day. When I buy my speargun, I'll take some pictures of it and my first haul of fish. Until then, I'll just keep on keeping on.
adios
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